Dear Lani

In the Playgrounds series, one of the Dommes in the community is Lani McMillan, fashionista, pro-kink counsellor and steadfast friend of Jacob and Luna. This weekly advice column is a tribute to one of the most influential characters at the Playgrounds.

Every second week, Domme Shadow, the inspiration behind the character Lani, and I will be picking and answering one question on power dynamics, kinks and other BDSM questions readers may have.

Got a question? Join The Muse’s Touch Facebook group to submit your questions and join in on the discussion. Every second Tuesday, we’ll be picking one question to answer for the following Monday.

What is really involved in preparing for a scene and aftercare look like? What do I have to know as Read more
What do I wear to a fetish event, like a convention or even a fetish club night? Read more
What is a fetish or kink convention really like? What can I expect if I go to one? Read more
What is a fetish or kink convention really like? What can I expect if I go to one? Read more
What are your favourite toys and things to do during scenes? Read more
One of the first things Luna notes is Lani's impossible heels. How does one go about being able to walk Read more
Where and how do you find a good Dom/me? Read more
How do you go about figuring out if someone is a sub, especially when you first meet them? Read more
How would you know if you're a Dom/me? Read more
What kind of dominance styles are there and what's your personl style" Read more
My partner is pretty conservative when it comes to sex. How can I start introducing him/her to BDSM? How do Read more
What are your views on power dynamics and how it impacts a relationship, in comparison to a vanilla one? Read more